At the end of the day, your goal should always be to do what’s best for your child.
If you travel frequently for work – particularly on long international trips – you’re probably wondering how this will impact your ability to get custody of your children in a divorce. And it’s a great question that’s worth exploring in more detail.
Understanding the court’s approach
Before we dig into some specific elements, it’s important to recognize how courts generally approach custody decisions. The main priority is always the welfare of the child. Judges often look for the option that offers the most stability and continuity in the child’s life. This typically means ensuring that the child’s daily routine, schooling, social life, and overall well being are disrupted as little as possible.
If you’re a parent who is often away due to business travels, the court might see this as a potential disruption to your child’s stable environment. Frequent absences can be viewed as a disadvantage because they might limit your availability to participate consistently in day-to-day parental duties. This doesn’t mean that you are out of the running for custody, but it does mean there are some extra steps you might need to consider to strengthen your case.
At first, this can be difficult to hear. But it’s important for you to separate yourself from the situation (as difficult as that is to do) and look at it from a third-party perspective.
Take all of the emotions out of it and think about it logically. (After all, that’s what a judge is supposed to do.)
Important notes and suggestions
If you remove the emotions from the situation – and view this as another family – it’s easy to see why frequent travel and extended absences could impact a custody decision. The court wants what is best for the child, and a child needs a consistent presence. But with that being said, there are still ways to get custody – partial or full – in spite of your busy travel lifestyle.
Let’s explore several suggestions and things to know:
Get professional legal advice
This should go without saying, but make sure you get legal advice tailored to your situation. Family law attorneys can provide insights into how local courts have handled similar cases and help you prepare a custody plan that addresses potential concerns raised by your travel schedule. They can also assist in crafting a narrative that highlights your strengths as a parent despite your frequent absences.
Document everything
One crucial step is to document and communicate the necessity of your travels. If your job requires you to be away, make sure you can clearly explain why these trips are essential. Perhaps they are critical for maintaining or increasing your family’s financial well-being. Be prepared to show how your travel supports the family economically and how it does not prevent you from fulfilling your parental responsibilities effectively.
On top of that, it’s beneficial to keep detailed records of your travel schedules and align them with evidence that you remain actively involved in your child’s life. This could include communication logs like daily calls or video chats with your child, involvement in school activities or homework help remotely, and arranging your travel schedule around important events in your child’s life whenever possible.
Show your commitment
Another important step is to demonstrate your commitment to making up for lost time when you are home. Emphasize the quality of the time spent with your child during these periods. Show that you engage in meaningful activities that enhance your bond, such as attending parent-teacher meetings, participating in or watching their extracurricular activities, and spending one-on-one time together. This approach can help counterbalance your periods of absence and reassure the court of your active involvement and interest in your child’s day-to-day life.
Try flexible custody arrangements
In cases where frequent travel is unavoidable, consider proposing a flexible custody arrangement. This might include more extended periods of custody during school holidays or breaks when you are in town, complemented by the other parent taking on more time during school terms when your travel is intensive. Proposals like this demonstrate your willingness to work cooperatively with the other parent and put the best interests of your child first. (Remember, this is the court’s priority.)
Foster healthy relationships
Do your best to maintain a positive and cooperative relationship with the other parent. This can be incredibly difficult to do in the moment – particularly when there are lots of deep emotional wounds and scars – but it’s necessary for the best interests of the child.
Demonstrating that you can communicate effectively and work together for the sake of your child is highly favorable in custody cases. It shows the court that you are both committed to co-parenting successfully, regardless of your personal or professional circumstances. In the end, this will usually be beneficial.
Do what’s best for your child
At the end of the day, your goal should always be to do what’s best for your child. If that means pursuing sole custody in spite of your busy travel schedule, then so be it. However, if you spend time thinking about it and realize that it may be best for you and the other parent to split custody, don’t be afraid to push aside your pride. There’s no easy answer in situations like this. It always comes down to sacrifice!
